The Martinoz Center: August 2009

9:33pm Tonight's objective: come up with a recipe for watermelon martinis. If possible, killer watermelon martinis. I've just had my Trader Joe's shrimp gyoza for a much needed dose of energy and I'm getting the ingredients together. Tonight's guest bartending consultant, let's call him Ringo Starr, is on his way.

10:12pm Two-day old watermelon juice may be more flavorful than just-squeezed watermelon juice.

10:24pm DeKuyper Watermelon Pucker tastes like crap, as expected. More specifically like bubblegum-flavored crap, but definitely nothing like watermelon. There's no way that shit's going into a killer watermelon martini.

10:35pm Tonight's guest bartending consultant, Ringo Starr, is here and becoming acquainted with the facilities.

10:58pm [Starr here] Drinks are good. Ceiling fan is good. Decorative chips are cute. Chance of Raines.

11:03pm 2 parts vodka, 4 parts watermelon, 1 part lime. Ringo Starr likes this one better than w/o the lime, but maybe b/c it's colder.

11:05pm [Starr again] Where the hell am I? I know when I got off the green line I was in Boston, but then I followed a transvestite into the darkness and suddenly I'm drinking martinis and live blogging. Is this safe? Will I make it home alive? I wish I had another drink -- ASK AND YOU SHALL RECEIVE.

11:19pm Substituted watermelon-infused Smirnoff for plain Stoli. Tonight's guest bartending consultant, Ringo Starr, thought I'd added the Pucker stuff. In fact, watermelon-infused Smirnoff does have a bubblegummy quality, althought less so than the Pucker crap. I'd say it's not a keeper. Which is bad, because now I have a whole bottle of it. Let's face it, there's no substitute for Stoli.

11:48pm [R.S.] Question -- will the party have bottomless martini glasses too? If so, I might just attend. I just hope it's not too Martinoz-weird. I just heard "i think this is going to be good. and very strong." I can't remember the last time I heard a woman say that.

12:03am Added 1 part watermelon Bacardi to the Stoli version. It's nice and strong. Tonight's guest bartending consultant, Ringo Starr, thought it was the best so far. However, he was unsure if he'd think it was the best if he'd had it first. A retest is in order but we may just have a killer watermelon martini in our hands.

12:07am Tonight's guest bartending consultant, Ringo Starr, is now on his way home, and perhaps on his way to being attacked by a transvestite.